September 2, 2015

Maybe...

Sometimes it is necessary to think on your life and the direction it is taking. Also to add is your marriage, and the possibility that maybe it was not the best thing to happen to you, especially if your wife is living 500 miles away, and every phone call between you two end in arguments.

Maybe it is time to say ENOUGH!

Maybe, living alone for many years had made it difficult for you to adjust to being married. Maybe the ‘idea’ of sacrifice of freedom hasn’t appealed to you. Maybe the idea of marriage is not your cup of tea. Maybe it is time to say good bye.

I know I would be hurting her parents, brother, sisters but she hurts me more daily. She hurts me lots…which is evident every evening when I sleep alone, and every morning when I wake up alone.
Maybe I have been influenced by western ideologies of relationships. Maybe tough I was born in the early eighties; I’m still a ‘modern’ child.

But to decide this step, whom do I consult. I need someone to listen. I need someone to understand. I need someone to know. To feel. To know. To understand.

I dare not call her on my cell phone anymore, because I know in the end I will be listening to her sob stories and accusations.

I was not cut out for this. I am not cut out for this.